Tertiary Survival

This is a piece I turned in for our motif assignment. It's one of my favorite pieces I've turned in this term and I enjoyed working on it so I decided to give it a little extra love. =]

The fog of deep breathing on a misty morning surrounded me as I crouched in the elderberry bush. Those amber eyes seemed to stare straight to my pounding heart, giving away my fear. They gave the illusion of not seeing, almost fooling me into thinking I was safe for the time being. It was then that I saw the beast’s shoulder muscles contract, its hind legs disappear beneath its rump, and its jaw clench. The split second between the pounce and when the cougar lay dead at my feet seemed to last forever. The leap through the air was so filled with rage, and yet elegant and graceful. I sent up a prayer and radioed my friend as I thought about the events leading up to this day, the pistol in my hand still smoking from the barrel.

It was nearly three years prior to the day of my first kill when I had my eyes opened to the realm of nature. My entire life I turned my nose up to anyone wearing camo or chewing Copenhagen; outdoor activities were out of the question. Rednecks and Republicans were hunters and campers, not educated businessmen such as myself. I was cutthroat, but in a different sense than a puma. I did not need razor-sharp teeth or a deadly pounce to manipulate my clients; I dealt purely with names and numbers. I had a quick tongue and sharp memory. I was top of my class from the University of Ohio, and narcissistic as hell. Yeah, I knew it all.

If you ask me what drove me to make the decision I did, I’m not sure I could tell you and feel like I was telling the entire truth, because I honestly still am not sure. I guess it had something to do with my go-getter-attitude, the sign of a true entrepreneur. When I was told my job was being moved to Montana, I didn’t view it as a demotion as most men of my status would. At first, I’ll admit I was a little offended, but then I saw this as a great opportunity to show corporate that I could make something out of nothing, even in South Canada.

So began my rummaging through the Sportsmen’s Warehouse trying to find clothes that would help me fit in amongst these people. I even took to drinking Busch beer the last few weeks I was home to try molding to the area before I got there. In retrospect, I would have taken that one back; Montanans drink the same beer as everyone else. Montanans, I also learned, were no more rugged and rough than most of the people I knew from Cleveland, it was just a different kind of rugged. The attitude I had going into this state, that I was superior to these people and their way of life, was nothing short of a power trip. I viewed myself as some type of messiah, a demigod sent to save these people and show them the light of business and management. Little did I know, they would be saving me.

Over the course of the next two and a half years after I moved, I found that my progress was slow, and my assumptions wildly inaccurate. Yes, the majority of the men in Great Falls chewed tobacco and hunted big game, but they were also educated and kind. I was met with an air of hospitality that I had never known in Cleveland. I tried many things that I never would have dreamt of doing previously, and began wearing Romeos daily. I was slowly adapting to my Montanan lifestyle, when one day I was forced to evolve fully.

A buddy of mine that I met through my work had invited me to go out hunting with him. When I revealed that I had never even watched a hunting show, let alone shot a gun, he chuckled and said I could just tag along. As we got out of his Tacoma he handed me a .45 and said, “All you gotta do is point and pull the trigger if something comes at you.” Greg told me to sit in the elderberry bush and radio him if I saw anything wander into the clearing. I wasn’t entirely sure why I had a gun when I wasn’t even licensed to hunt but I didn’t argue. He took off to the next clearing over and I remember thinking this would be a great nap opportunity considering we’d been up since before dawn. I had never been much of a religious man back in Ohio. Even after my move I found it hard to accept the massive amounts of Christianity around me. That day, however, I met God, in a way that freed me from my suit and tie forever.

I awoke with a start when I heard the crash of branches breaking maybe 200 yards down the hill. I remember getting really nervous and I wasn’t sure why; I knew a deer wouldn’t come close enough to hurt me. That’s when I saw it, slinking through the foliage towards me, eyes locked onto its prey. I used to think that I panicked before exams or before a big deal with another company, but this was a whole new level of panic. It was at this moment that I learned what hyperventilation meant and the true meaning of having the shakes. I even forgot for a while that I had a gun holstered to my hip…

As I looked into the glazed over eyes that had gripped my soul for what seemed like years, I felt a rush of emotions flood over me. I was shocked, scared, angry, happy and relieved. But most of all, I felt powerful. Not because I had taken a life, or saved my own. I felt the power of knowing I was saved. I had escaped the clutches of danger by accepting a lifestyle, the people included in that lifestyle, and the God that watched over all of us. That day is the day I will remember for the rest of my life, as the beginning of my life. The day I survived.

Song suggestions

Hildreth- The Love Song by K-OS. This rap is rather intelligent and breaks the trends of typical rap. I really enjoy the message and I think you will too.

Josh- Running on Empty by Jackson Browne. Always a classic "Get going" song. Hopefully you'll get a jumpstart from it.

Meredith- Time After Time acoustic cover by Saosin. This song is a great cover and Saosin is a band that is a well kept secret to most.

Ashley- The Show Goes On by Lupe Fiasco. As the title suggests, this song talks about persevering through difficult times and giving life your all.

Andrew- The Artist in the Ambulance by Thrice. This song is just inspiring to live your life to the fullest and make the most of your first chance in case you don't get a second.

Kelli- Samson by Regina Spektor. Regina has a soft, beautiful voice and puts a lot of meaning behind what she sings. She just strikes me as an artist you would enjoy.

Kelly- Sick Little Suicide by The Matches. This song alludes to life being a simple matter of choosing your own poison, a trend I can find in a lot of your writing.

Cat- Radioactive by Kings of Leon. This song is just great. It follows the soft play that Kings of Leon uses but is a little more outside the box than normal.

Charity- Sounds Like Life to Me by Darryl Worley. This song will help you see the light in crappy situations and remind you to keep on keepin' on.

Gordon- Cult of Personality by Living Colour. This is a classic rock song that I'm sure you've heard before but for me it rates up there with a lot of music The Beatles came out with and I've always enjoyed it. I hope you do also.

Kesia- Nest by Steve Jablonsky. This is one of the instrumentals from Transformers II and includes an instrumental from the Linkin Park theme song also. I figured you'd enjoy this.

Wayne- God's Gonna Cut You Down by Johnny Cash. Johnny has always been a legend of rock and roll and his music is still included in today's media and pop culture. This song is about being the dark horse and prevailing by doing the right thing.

Frank- Know Your Enemy by Rage Against the Machine. This song is about fighting for what is right, not what you're told is right.

Noelle- Beauty in the Breakdown by The Scene Aesthetic. TSA performs most of its music unplugged but that doesn't mean it's all soft. This song in particular has a good tempo and good meaning.

Amy- Officer by Slightly Stoopid. This mix of pop and reggae is a great song for a feel good playlist and would give you something to relax to.

Richard- Up, Up and Away by KiD CuDi. This song is a great way to start your day off and will help you be excited for the challenge at hand.

Taking the reins

I find it amazing how easy it is to block out your surroundings when you're deep in thought. It's almost as if your mind builds a wall around you so that you are protected from all that is not what it deems important. I'm not one to think a lot, but I couldn't seem to do much else for those couple of weeks. I guess big decisions do that to you when you're used to someone else making them for you.

"Andrew! Are you ok? You seem kinda out of it..."

I nodded my head and replied "Y-yeah I'm fine sorry. What were you saying?"

It was at this point that I realized how ridiculously cold it was at the bus stop that Thursday. I didn’t hear what Sara, my morning bus stop buddy, had to say for a second time; I was too focused on how it could be so cold still in June. My hair on my arm stood as if it was at attention under my suit jacket and my teeth began chattering. I nervously checked my watch, as was my custom when I felt impatient. 7:07. Seven of my precious minutes had been burned by someone else’s tardiness. I’ve never been one to wait on people happily.

“Where is this damn bus?” I groaned.

“Seriously, Drew what’s wrong? I’ve never seen you so on edge.”

I just turned towards the road and tapped my left foot three times, then my right. Finally, I saw that filthy public transit bus pop over the hill; welcome to the most exciting part of my day. It was on this 48 minute bus ride that I observed some of the most interesting people and habits I had ever seen in my life. It was also one of the most diverse environments I had the pleasure of being a part of: I saw men and women in love, crack heads, teens that didn’t have cars, men and women in uniform, transients, hung over men from last night’s bar escapades, and every morning there was one person who was in awe of the scene, a newcomer.

I often wondered what these people thought of me, what category I fell into. I liked to think that I was the type of man that everyone thought seemed out of place, because the truth is I probably was. With a salary of over $240,000 a year, I had no business riding the bus every morning. I found some sort of sick comfort in this ritual though. It reminded me of a simpler time, when I didn’t have a CEO breathing down my neck and I could go fishing or camping on the weekends. I think it made me feel just a little less disgusted with the work I did. I secretly hated my life; the problem was I didn’t even know that I did at that point. It would only take me about three hours to figure it all out though.

As I walked absentmindedly into the office building I was immediately bombarded by interns asking if I needed anything or if there was something for them to do. I shed each of them by assigning random, worthless bits of work, anything to get my extra 53 seconds of peace during my elevator ride to the 12th floor. I snapped twice with my left hand and clicked the number 12. The sudden change in temperature when I entered the building made me start to sweat, so I wiped my brow as the doors slid open with a ding.

“Damnit Wilson why are you late?!” Mr. Grogden, the head CEO, snapped at me as I walked in the door.

“Sir, I’m 20 minutes early today,” I shot back.

“Well that obviously isn’t early enough. What have you figured out about the Hanson project? The president is barking up my tree and I’ve been going to bat for you but I can’t stall him any longer!”

“My report is almost finished and will be on your desk by the end of the day sir.” I had to count down from 11 in my head to keep from losing it.

“Get your ass to work then and don’t bother me until you’ve finished!”

The Hanson project was this idea that Grogden had cooked up in an attempt to give the appearance of giving back to the community. In all actuality, we were on a path of rampant destruction of one neighborhood, Valley Springs, while drawing attention towards the one on our block that we were “donating” a park to. It was injustice at its finest, a sweet candy with a sour inside. It had come to be my responsibility to plan the attack and pull it off swiftly and quietly. I was the double agent, the inside man that Valley Springs trusted, only to find themselves betrayed and looking for new homes for the sole reason of company expansion. This part of the plan was called “Shit or Get Off the Pot Time.”

I had spent most of the past two weeks stalling. I made it look like I was working and manipulating, but the manipulation part was at a standstill. I was only making it harder on myself. Befriending those you are about to pull the rug out from under is breaking cardinal rule number one when screwing people over. I decided my sweat had nothing to do with the temperature change.

I only made it ‘til about mid morning before I began the march back to Grogden’s office. I had been staring at a blank report for over two hours prior to then, and had managed to accomplish nothing besides enhance the stomach ache I’d been suffering from all morning. I took a deep breath, blinked four times and pushed open the office doors without so much as a knock.

That Saturday I was up in the woods, well out of cell phone coverage and far from the world of public transit and heartless CEOs, completely at peace with myself.

Eragon

I didn't read very many books that had to do with a coming of age message when I was an adolescent. I read what was required in my English classes and then I delved into my own interests which usually included works of fiction that were about the reading level of Tolkein's work. I did read a few more grade level readings, one of them being Eragon, the first of a four book series by Christopher Paolini. Eragon tells the tale of a teenage boy that finds himself with a large burden upon his shoulders that he did not ask for. He has lived a relatively simple life until he finds a dragon egg and his village is raided by creatures searching for the egg. The egg eventually hatches into a dragon, Saphira, forever linking herself to Eragon and making him a Dragon Rider. Eragon is thrust into adulthood as he must go on the run when his uncle is killed by the monsters.

Throughout his travels Eragon reaches many turning points in his life that force him to mature both physically and mentally. These situations can often be linked to real life situations that adolescents in today's world would encounter, and makes it easy for the reader to relate to his struggles and get into the story more. Eragon wrestles with the difficulties of losing loved ones and friends, falling in love, and facing situations he has never previously been in. It is through these hardships that he finds himself growing more and more in tune with himself, as well as Saphira.

Many teens and preteens feel confused and misunderstood in life, unable to find themselves. Oftentimes life puts ordinary people in extraordinary situations and they must learn how to conquer the problem at hand or, sometimes in a literal sense, perish. I feel that this story brings about an escape for those who are struggling with a task or life problem, and allows them to focus on someone else's problems for a little while. An escape is what most adolescents are searching for so they turn to video games or television to find this realm of non-existence, even if just for a few short hours. Media such as these and the internet provide more and more reasons for teens to not pick up books. They are also much easier to process, very seldom require critical thought, and allow the teen to put forth maybe half of the effort required to read a book.

This story of Eragon's coming of age brings forth a good scenario that teens can use to escape life and avoid using electronic sources to do so. I liked the way I could feel empathy for the character throughout the whole book, and the sequel as well, in which Eragon grows ever more into himself as a young man.